In January of 2021 my husband and I had a panic attack, as I decided to walk into my corporate, reliable, good income job and say “I quit”. My palms were sweaty, my knees weak, and of course, arms heavy… but I haven’t looked back since!
For a little background; I’ve had a job since the ripe age of 14. Yes, before it was even legal for me to work, I was working. I always knew I wanted my own money, I didn’t want to have to rely on anyone, or ask anyone (my parents at the time) for money to buy clothes, or if I wanted to go get a snack from the store. Money to me meant independence.
Truthfully, I loved my job. I was working at a large food distribution company in their marketing department. I traveled all over the state, and even was able to travel to different states for conferences. I was working my way up, and then BOOM… I became a Mom.
I always knew that when Jordon and I had kids, it would be hard for me to leave them. But I was determined to try to make it work. For the first 12 weeks of Avery’s life I was on maternity leave, spending every waking moment with her. The day I had to drop her off at daycare for the first time, I bawled my damn eyes out. No exaggeration, I could’t even talk I was crying so hard. Thank goodness Jordon was there to answer the teachers questions, because I couldn’t piece together a coherent sentence if I tried.
We did the daycare hustle for about 5 months before I approached Jordon asking his opinion about me leaving my job and staying home with our baby. He was… surprised to say the least haha. After weeks of budgeting and discussions, we agreed, I took the plunge. I walked out of my 8am – 5pm cubical job to be with my baby 24/7. And at the time I didn’t understand how long 24/7 really was… but I’d find out.
Now… you’re probably waiting for me to tell you staying home with my baby was magical, and mystical unicorns appeared while Avery and I thrived everyday. Reality check – it’s hard. Being a mom in general is just hard.
But it’s time for me to lay it out – what being a SAHM has been like for the last two years for ME. As a SAHM/ work from home Mom of two little girls, 2 and under.
This was the first time, in well basically my whole life I didn’t have a set schedule. From the time that we start preschool we have a schedule. Where to be in the morning, when to eat, when to have a break and when to go home. I woke up that first morning and was like… now what? It was a weird realization that I had to come up with our schedule. It took me some time.
It can be lonely. You’re at home all day, while most people you know are at work. I’m home with two little girls who don’t talk back… although Avery’s getting pretty good at being able to hold a conversation with me now (kind of lol). But I do find myself craving some adult interaction somedays.
Finding the motivation to get ready everyday is hard. It is SO easy to just stay in your pajamas all day. Not bothering to do your hair, makeup, or putting on clothing that you didn’t sleep in. I find myself somedays saying “what’s the point?” What’s the point if no one will see me, or I’ll just get covered in food, breastmilk or God knows what else throughout the day. But the point is, it makes you feel good. Do it for YOU. Just because I might not leave the house, that doesn’t mean I have to look like the troll that lives under the bridge. When I look better, I feel better.
There’s no breaks. Being a Mom is 24/7 and when you’re with your kids 24/7 that leaves little to no break time at all. As awful as dropping my baby off at daycare was (for me), it at least gave me a break during the day to feel like my own person. I don’t have that anymore. I’ve learned to adjust, and find pockets of time throughout the week for myself, but that took a lot of practice and awareness on my end. Take time for yourself Mama. You’re still a person too.
Now time for some positive things about being a SAHM. I get to be with my kids for everything. That can be just as challenging as it is rewarding somedays. But ultimately, I’m their person, and I’ll be forever thankful for that.
I’ve made so many connections and have a little SAHM community that I never would have had otherwise. Going to events in the area during the day, you’re bound to run into other Mama’s just out and about with their babies. I was so shy to introduce myself at first, but then I realized, they’re usually just as eager to meet other Mama’s as I was. I’ve made some great friends in the past two years. Thankful for my village.
The freedom I have through the day and the flexibility with my job. One of my biggest reasons for leaving my 9-5 was I felt like I had to choose between being a present Mom or providing for my family. I was SO beyond lucky to find the job I have now with The WanderWeb. Now I no longer feel like it’s a choice. I’m able to take my girls to the park, or library, and while they nap, I work. Balance – the way working should be. Although, I will admit, it can be a huge challenge sometimes working on client accounts while my girls are home. If my boss was not so understanding with me only working part-time and non-traditional hours, I probably wouldn’t be able to pull it off. Kudos to my boss Corey, she’s the shit.
Whether you decide to stay home, or send your little one to daycare, you’re still an amazing Mom. It’s truly the hardest and most rewarding job out there. Pat yourself on the back girl, you deserve it. I’m forever blessed and thankful for my amazing husband for taking on the role of sole provider and giving me the opportunity to stay home with our girls. It’s been a rollercoaster of ups and downs these last two years, but I wouldn’t change a thing ❤️ (except maybe getting a chef… because cooking 3 meals a day, everyday is a scam lol).
Til next time ✌️
– Kelli Denley
KD MARKETING - Kelli Denley 
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